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                生命的欺騙

                小故事網 欺騙的故事 時間:2016-05-12 崔效鋒

                  辦公室外面,有一棵碗口粗的大葉紫薇。

                  隨著陽春三月漸近尾聲,紫薇樹旁邊的大葉榕新長的葉子已是滿眼翠綠,而那棵紫薇依然枯瘦蕭殺,干巴巴的枝干上殘留著數不清干枯龜裂的果子。辦公室在二樓,兩棵樹的樹冠恰好能夠時不時映入眼簾。強烈的視覺對比常使人產生一種季節的迷惑,也常常讓我懷疑那棵大葉紫薇是否已經到了生命的盡頭,是否真的被白蟻蛀蝕,在這個蕩漾生命綠色的季節里,以畢剝的形態宣告自己的死亡?

                  隱約記得也是去年的這個時候,紫薇已經纖細的軀體上已經鋪滿了濃濃的春色。還記得綠色遍身的紫薇不久后就綻放出惹眼的大片大片的紅花,那個熱鬧和愜意常常使我對這株紫薇充滿了難忘的期待。而今年,現在,莫非這株紫薇真的消亡了嗎?

                  兩天前,和岑老師站在樓道里聊天,還曾經面對著紫薇樹唏噓慨嘆了好久。紫薇樹的枯枝就伸展在我們的眼前,看上去已然沒有了任何生命的跡象。岑老師伸手捉住幾根枝椏,稍一用力,樹枝就在清脆聲中斷落在手中。我們細細看去,整個的枝莖中沒有任何的潮濕和水分,更沒有點點綠色。于是我們認為這棵紫薇真的枯死了,我還記得岑老師又弄斷了很多的枯枝,準備用作少年軍校學員們野炊時的引火燃料。

                  周一回到學校,暮春四月剛剛開始。當鑰匙插入鐵門,準備打開辦公室大門時,眼睛的余光不經意地瞄了一眼旁邊的紫薇。剎那,我的視線凝固了,身體也為之一顫:那棵兩天前就已斷定枯死的紫薇樹的枝干上,竟然爬滿了細微嫩綠的新芽。葉芽如此之小,在滿眼枯黃之中顯得如此單薄和寧靜,在灰黑色的果子的遮掩之下,那一點點的綠色竟然勃發出無窮的力量。很長的時間里,我竟然忘記了開門,學生在我身邊陸續經過不斷問好,我也竟然毫無反應。我似乎又依稀看到大片大片的紅艷艷的紫薇花,似乎又感受到了即將盛開的生命的顏色。

                  生命的欺騙我興奮地把我的發現第一時間告訴了岑老師,感嘆著紫薇的生命竟然如此堅強,竟然如此充滿了欺騙。記得那天我還和岑老師商量著紫薇樹的“后事”,討論著該為這片即將空置的土地上種植哪種樹木。而今天,紫薇就以點點的綠色嘲弄了我們的淺薄與悲觀。

                  也許錯不在我們,也許學校很多的師生如我們一樣,在期待中漸漸麻木,在期待中放棄了希望。難道我們能怪罪那棵依然安靜的紫薇,怪罪它以時間和外表掩飾生命的光輝?

                  行文至此,我恍然頓悟:也許,這就是生命的欺騙。之所以被蒙騙,恰恰是我們充滿了對紫薇樹當下的期待,在于我們太相信表象,太相信自己的經驗和直覺。

                  每年,我都記得那棵紫薇會綴滿綠葉,會綻放花朵,但卻忘記了具體的時間。于是,春暖花開,滿眼皆綠的時節,眼中就容不下紫薇的枯黃依舊,就斷定它已然死亡。難道,我們對所有的植物,都必須充滿相同的期望?

                  從折斷的樹枝上,我們沒有窺探到一絲絲活著的證據,于是斷定它已死亡。難道眼見必然為實?難道紫薇就不能以它特有的方式注釋它特別的生命特征?

                  我們是否也在以這種眼光審視世間的一切,是否也以此種淺薄和呆板看待我們身邊的一個個生命?

                  假如孩子并沒有如我們所愿的那樣去生活、去學習、去行動,我們是否也在意識中慢慢否定孩子,是否也為孩子的成長和發展草率地添加上一個句號?如果孩子表現出種種不理智、不合常規的所謂“問題行為”,我們是否曾經輕狂地在心中說過:“這人完了!”

                  是的,生命有很多很多的欺騙,我們所面對的孩子也是如此。他們會顯露出太多太多的假象。有時未必是孩子的本意,有時卻又是孩子無意識中對生命的吶喊與對抗。而作為教育者,必須對孩子充滿期待,必須在心中為孩子勾畫美好的生命未來。

                  可以想見,紫薇樹上淡淡的新綠會逐漸蔓延和傳染,紫薇花也會在不久的將來吐露芬芳。而我,依然可以在疲勞和煩悶的時候,感受生命的力量。但我們,一個個在小學從事著平凡工作的普通教師,能否透過生命的假象,撇去刻意的欺騙和掩飾,永遠充滿期待與希冀地對待一個個勃發內在生命秩序的鮮活生命?

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